It is spring and this morning I noticed a bunch of moths or baby butterflies floating around the house. I looked out over the deck and realised there were hundreds. I ran to the bathroom window and there were more still. It must have been thousands swarming around the house. The day we decided to buy this house we were standing on the deck and there were butterflies lilting across the sky over the rainforest. Seeing this re-birth of the moths or butterflies reminded me of the beauty of the place we are lucky enough to call home. It re-ignited in me the sense of closeness and attachment I feel to living here. It felt reassuring, like the butterflies had surrounded our house to renew my faith, or something like that, it just felt nice.
The cutest thing happened the other morning. I woke up to Todd trying to creep his hand across my belly and feel the baby without waking me up. I tried to pretend I was asleep but after a while and baby not moving I rolled over and whispered ‘I’ll go to the toilet, that usually gets Bub moving’. We had a giggle. Sometimes I can’t help but feel that the blokes miss out on all this magical stuff. Todd assures me that he isn’t jelous and reckons he would freak out if something was growing inside him. He’s asked me before if I feel weird, like I’ve got an alien inside me. Here I am wondering if he feels like he’s missing out and there he is wondering if I am feeling like I have an alien inside! Must be a bloke thing.
Speaking of bloke things, Todd was trying to explain to someone how big/small my belly is at the moment. They asked if a Malteeseer rested on it would it roll off. Todd of course said yes but I was struck by a few things. Firstly – really how strange are men’s minds? Secondly, would a Malteeser ever have not rolled off my belly and thirdly, how can I pretend I need to do this experiment so that I can eat Malteesers.
I would explain my growth like this: bras don’t fit anymore, I can’t wear any of my old skirts or pants and my wardrobe consists of stretchy dresses that look very different to when I used to wear them pre-pregnancy, or maternity clothes sent from my Mum.
I have these crazy side hairs which I refer to as my side burns. According to my hairdresser sometime in the pregnancy those hairs fell out and the short frizzy fly away bits are just it growing back. Hmm, no it’s not all about the belly.
And I have discovered a very alarming trend – my knickers no longer cover all of my butt.
We went to the basketball last night and as we were watching the cheerleaders gracefully spring around on stage with the lightness of a barbiedoll on a trampline I couldn’t help but think of how I squatted down today and it took two goes to get up.
There was a mini-squad and one little girl who would have had to have been only four fell over as they were running onto the court. We watched with baited breath as her lip quivered and her face fell and we hoped she would be able to hold it together. I am happy to say she did, and even we – strangers – were proud. It got me thinking – oh the joys and trials we are yet to see. I am so glad I have Todd with me, who sees things differently, but who, when it comes down to it – believes the same as me in the big stuff. I can’t wait to teach our children with him.